Ang sarap din umupo at makinig na lamang... I just got home from the lenten reco. Before going there, i really set my mind na makikinig ako... May pagka ADHD kasi ako e. What I did, umupo ako sa front row same time assist na din the technicals of the reco. We had two speakers, one was fr. Gaston. He talked about conversion and forgiveness... Na forgiveness comes after conversion of the heart. Na never nag impose si God never namilit na bumalik sa kanya but He always wait for us. We had freedom pero true freedom is the capacity to do good. But when it is abused and caused me sin... I'll be enslaved by it and it is like natrapped in a quicksand... No other way but to hold God's hand to pull me up. It's a grace from the Lord... the gift of conversion.
After Fr. Gaston, it was fr. johnny go. Inabangan ko talaga si fr. johnny kasi sobrang natutuwa talaga ako sa kanya pag nagtatalk siya. Anyways, the title of his talk was God in the dungeon... Title palang na stuck na ako. He asked us to examine our live... Is my life a bowl of cherry or am i in the pits? when i answered the survey, i got 2 at some areas and 3 sa iba... Di ko naman kasi consider na super i'm in the pits pero di naman na ok na ok... Mejo leaning nga na parang asa pit e pero sabi ko sa sarili ko i don't want to dwell on sa negativity ng life ko pero yes, it was a struggle and keep on working on it. Ang galing lang when fr.johnny said sa si God inallow nya maging loser siya nun nabubuhay cia sa earth he allowed to be crucified not because he is a weakling but he wants na samahan ang mga losers like me. Naredefined sa akin ung meaning ng failure... I might be a failure somehow pero God doesn't want me sa dark dungeon ko... Handa siyang madumihan just to enter my dungeon... Unti unti nang lumiliwanag dungeon ko sinasamahan kasi ako ni God... And it is always a decision for me to keep the faith or not... But i want to keep mine... I pray na samahan ako ni God palagi... never loose me again...
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